Interviews // Callie Carpinteri and Emma Parks (Dirty Towel)

Harmony Witte: Congratulations on having Dirty Towel screen at Tribeca film festival. That’s really cool!

Callie Carpinteri: Thank you.

Harmony Witte: Will you tell me a little bit about your roles in the production?

Callie Carpinteri: Emma and I are the co-writers of the short, and then we are both also producers of the short, and I’m the director.

Emma Parks: I’m also the lead actress in it.

Harmony Witte: Okay, so you both wrote this. Whose idea was it? How did the idea come about?

Emma Parks: It was a very, very collaborative process to get this idea where it is today. I think it kind of started from just the fact that we both grew up women in this crazy, complex, often very challenging world to navigate. There are things in that that can feel very isolating and challenging, and you can feel alone in that. And one day, over In n Out burgers (so thank you, In n Out) Callie and I were just having a conversation, and somehow the idea of shame and guilt around your sexual choices came up, and the more we talked about it, we found this almost safe haven in the commonality we shared in our experiences, and we started talking to other people and just realized that this experience is a very universally relatable thing that a lot of people, regardless of gender, everyone goes through. And we had one friend who said that their mom used a metaphor of a dirty towel when talking about sex to them. And we were like, “that’s it. That’s the idea. There’s a short film here” Our goal is always just to make a film that people can relate to and see themselves in. And so that’s what we tried to do with this and kind of where the idea came from.

Harmony Witte: Can you give me a brief synopsis of Dirty Towel?

Callie Carpinteri: Dirty Towel follows a young woman named Charlie who’s grappling with feelings of shame and guilt after having sex for the first time, leading to a thoughtful explanation of generational shame, societal expectations, and self-worth.

Harmony Witte: Did either of you hear the chewing gum metaphor when you were growing up? It’s similar to the dirty towel metaphor. Basically, (I think they say this in a lot of youth groups) if you have sex, it’s like you’re chewing a piece of gum and then passing that piece of gum on to someone else pre-chewed. Where are you all from? Did you grow up in the South or the North? Where were you hearing the messages about sex?

Callie Carpinteri: So, I grew up in South Florida. I then went to school in North Florida. So, Florida. It’s like half the south, half not. But mostly from the experiences that I touched on. From this, a lot of it came. I did hear these messages in church and things as well, but also, you know, kind of passed down through my family. That’s kind of where my experiences came that I pulled from.

Emma Parks: I grew up half my life in Los Angeles, other half just outside Chicago. And, yeah, for me, I think the metaphors and this experience kind of came more from my experience within society and at school and with my peers. I mean, to a degree, it also was passed down generationally, but I think I felt more pressure from the people around me and judgment from those who went to my school and kind of grew up with that idea as well. So, it’s just kind of is everywhere, even if you don’t realize it.

Harmony Witte: When I went to high school in Appalachia in Southwest Virginia, and they actually had a magician come in and do an assembly and perform little magic tricks to teach us about abstinence, it was the wildest thing, and he was being heckled by the audience the whole time. But it was straight up school sanctioned abstinence education. It was the wildest thing. And I was wondering if after people watch your film, do they come up and tell you crazy stories about their sex education?

Emma Parks: Oh, yeah. I mean, every single person who has read the script, who’s seen the short anything has come up to us and been like, wow, I have an experience that was so similar to this. I had a sex talk from my mom that was crazy. There’s a classic line, “nobody wants the cow if you get the milk for free.” All sorts of metaphors. But I think that’s what has been kind of cool about this whole experience is just that it seems that we’ve really hit something that everyone can see themselves in, and that’s been very rewarding and cool, but we have definitely heard all sorts of stories, although yours might be at the top.

Callie Carpinteri: That’s crazy.

Harmony Witte: I know a lot of productions are now using intimacy coordinators. Do you have any thoughts on that?

Callie Carpinteri: We actually did have an intimacy coordinator that was something that I felt like was really important to have, especially because I had never directed a scene like that, for Emma and Ben. I wanted them to feel comfortable, so we actually had a really great intimacy coordinator. She was sending me clips of other movies, and we were picking moments that we liked, and then the four of us together spent an hour and a half blocking out every single moment that you see was not improvised. She helped bring it together so much, and I think it’s really important after talking with people, learning that some sets still don’t have intimacy coordinators is crazy, because I feel like it was so important to have that extra party checking in beforehand to help. But also, on set with Emma and Ben, making sure they were good.
I think it’s a really great thing that studios and places are starting to have them more.

Emma Parks: Yeah, it was really great. And she was so professional and amazing. And I think from the actor perspective, there are sometimes very tricky power dynamics on set and in theater rehearsals and whatever. And so, I do think it’s really great and very important to have intimacy coordinators who work as that in between and are always checking on the well-being of the actor first, because if they’re uncomfortable, what’s the point? So, I’m very grateful that that’s something that is being normalized in the industry, and I very much support it.

Harmony Witte: Something I always like to ask creative people is about imposter syndrome, because I have a theory that in order to create, most people have imposter syndrome, and have to work past it. So that makes the act of creation an act of bravery in a way. And so, I’m curious, does confidence in your work and yourself come naturally, or do you have to work through a level of imposter syndrome?

Callie Carpinteri: No, I definitely have imposter syndrome a lot of times, which is something I’m actually trying to work to be better at, too. And I think for me what helps me is talking to people about it, talking to other collaborators that I work with. It’s good to believe in yourself, but sometimes you do get in your head. I get in my head, and it’s nice to just share those feelings with people and be like, “hey, I’m like worried that I’m not doing this right” or that “I’m worried how this is going to be” and just having the support of people to be like,” just believe in yourself, focus.” For me, what really helps me with directing is doing a lot of prep before. Helps me feel more confident on set. If I feel like I’ve prepared enough that I’m like, “okay, I know what I want to do now. It’s just going there and doing it” and it’s definitely a tricky thing, especially, I think, for us, being young female filmmakers there is always a lot of pressure on. People underestimate you or not, being sure. But I think for me, that’s where surrounding myself with other collaborators who are uplifting and supporting each other, that’s where I start to feel like, “okay, I can do this” and,” I can do this to the best of my ability.” So at least that’s my experience. I know, Emma, you might have a different one, being an actress and stuff.

Emma Parks: I mean, I’m just going to second everything you said. I definitely, definitely feel the imposter syndrome. You know, I’ll literally be on set in the middle of a take, and just all of a sudden, my head, I’ll be like, “oh, my God, I’m the worst actress in the whole world” type of thing, you know? And I think it’s definitely leaning on people around me who are not only supportive, but also honest. And that’s very important to me. I never want to just surround myself with yes people. I want to surround myself with people who will tell me the truth and push me to be better. And again, preparation. I’m huge on prepping. I do a lot, a lot of work before I go into characters, and I think that having that to lean on, especially when you’re in front of the camera, is a really amazing thing. That helps a lot. And then just trying to watch my work sometimes with a little less judgment and a little more kindness. And seeing that, I am in a film that’s at Tribeca or I did get cast in this, and so I must not be awful.

Harmony Witte: Do you all have any upcoming projects that you can talk about?

Callie Carpinteri: Something that we had discussed when we were creating the idea of Dirty Towel was that we had this idea to actually make it a feature film. And it was something that we kind of always knew that we wanted the short to be set up like a proof of concept for that, kind of touching on the themes and the characters and the world that they’ll be in. And so, since completing the short, Emma and I have actually been writing the feature we’re a few drafts in and just working on it. And the feature expands more on not just Charlie’s journey, but also her mother, Elizabeth. So, giving a little bit more insight into the experiences that shaped her and how they’re shaping Charlie now as well as her own personal journey in finding herself again as a woman in her thirties and at the same time, she’s coming into herself that Charlie’s also coming of age. going through this really important shift in her life as well. So now we’ve just been working on that, and our hope is to make that in the next year or two.

Harmony Witte: Awesome. I can’t wait to see it. That’ll be great. Do you have anything else coming up? Emma? Are you focusing on the feature?

Emma Parks: Yeah, I mean, this is very much my main focus right now. I think we both just think it’s a very important story that already has gotten a great response, and especially at a time in our world where there’s a lot of debate going on about who should have a say over what women do with their body and what choices they make. We just think it is an important thing to further explore, and there’s a lot to further explore. But besides that, I have this movie that I just did this past summer that’s probably going to come out in the next year or so, and other than that, kind of just auditioning and doing the thing. So, this one’s the main focus, though. So, I’m very optimistic and hopeful about it.